How Traveling/Backpacking Can Boost Your Social Skills

Many people who used to be socially clueless and then got over it can trace a lot of their improvement back to a few key choices they made. For me one of these was deciding to go traveling. I got so much practice working on my people skills there that I wasn't the same person when I came back.

A few years ago I spent about a year backpacking around Australia. Now to anyone who's done it, 'backpacking' is a euphemism for 'staying at one hostel after another on a well-worn tourist path and partying a lot with other travelers'. If I had gone to Europe or South East Asia I probably would have had a similar time. North America can be fun too, but I've heard the hostel system isn't as built up over here. It wasn't the most rugged or original travel experience, but it was a blast.

I went after I had finished university. My goal was mainly to have a fun year away from reality, go to a country I always wanted to visit, and party a bit. By the time I was done with college I was in better shape socially than I was at the end of high-school, but my people skills were still below par in a lot of ways. By the time I got home they were much better. Not a bad bonus for something I would have done anyways.

Obviously traveling is very fun. Everyone knows it broadens your horizons and makes you a better person. If you're young and not tied down with responsibilities you should go for just those reasons. But besides from that, here are some reasons to go in keeping with the theme of this site.

Backpacking is an extremely social experience. It's pretty hard for it not to boost your social skills

Backpacking is concentrated social practice. Upon arriving in a new city you can go around and see most of the touristy sights after a few days. In a small town you can see everything in an afternoon. Seeing a bunch of buildings, exhibits, or scenery gets old surprisingly quickly and rings hollow if you do it alone. You soon realize that most of the fun comes from the people you meet and the experiences you share with them.

Backpackers stay in hostels. Hostels are full of other travelers. Everyone is a stranger and is eager to meet new people. It's really easy to make friends and meet people to hang around with. If you don't try and meet anyone you get bored and lonely very quickly. Once you've made some friends you get to hang around with them until you or they move on to the next place. Sometimes this is a few days, sometimes it's few weeks. At other times you travel with them for a while. Your relationships with people tend to be shorter, but more intense, compared to back home. Once you arrive at the next place the process starts over again.

You'll meet a ton of people. You'll meet the people you're sharing a room with. You'll meet them in your hostel's T.V. room, pool, or kitchen. I'll generalize and say that the people who go backpacking tend to be more fun, interesting, and outgoing than your average person... or maybe the circumstances just bring those traits out in everyone. You run into the odd weirdo, but mostly everyone you meet is pretty cool and worth knowing.

Also, the people you meet are less intimidating than the ones at home because you tend to see them as non-threatening, positive stereotypes. When you see someone you tend to think, "Oh! A Swede! Cool! Swedes are fun and laid back. I want to talk to him!" At home you're more likely to size someone up first and come up with reasons why you wouldn't get along with them or they wouldn't want to talk to you. The people you meet while traveling don't carry the baggage that the ones from your own area do.

So where does this all lead for someone whose people skills could use some improvement? Well...

You're put into a situation where you're pretty much forced to be outgoing and meet new people, but it's easy to do so.
You get practice in talking to lots of people.
You get to meet people from lots of different countries.
You get practice in making friends.
You get practice in hanging around people one-on-one and in groups.
You get to meet a ton of people of the opposite sex too.
The people you meet are all pretty cool and you're bound to pick up some good traits from them.
You learn to do all this quickly.
You're just spending tons of time around people, period.

Tips for meeting people while you're backpacking

I already covered where you'll meet people. Unless you make a concerted effort to be anti-social, you'll meet tons of fellow travelers naturally. The magic conversation starting sentence is, "Where are you from?".

To get a group of people together to go out with the magic sentence is, "We're going to ____, want to come?".

If you have nothing to do the phrase to say is, "You guys are going to _____? Mind if I come along?"

Some other things to say are:

"How long have you been in ____?"
"Where were you before you came here?"
"Have you been to ____ yet?"

None of these are super creative, but they'll get a conversation started really easily. Also, you're going to hear the same questions and comments about your country over and over so it helps to have some interesting/witty things to say when the topic comes up.

Traveling makes you a cooler, more interesting person

Traveling indirectly improves your social success in all the ways outlined in this article. Your personality will change for the better. You'll come home with lots of good stories. Some people will just be impressed that you went on the trip.

You can overdo it of course. You don't want to be that person who starts every sentence with, "When I was in..." or who still constantly goes on about a trip they took five years ago.

Depending on where you go there are certain things you have to do just for the points they'll get you back home. If you go to Australia you must do something surfing or diving related. When I got home a few times I'd be chatting to someone and I'd mention that I just got back from Australia. You could see the wheels turning for a second before their eyes lit up and they asked, "Oooh! Did you surf?!?" I actually didn't much, but in hindsight I wish I had. I'm not sure what the equivalent experiences are for other places. If you go to Europe there are definitely attractions and cities people are interested in. Not too sure about Thailand...

Backpacking is a great preparation for college life

Going off to university and living in residence has a lot of things in common with traveling around and staying in hostels. If you want to give yourself a head start on getting comfortable with the whole college experience, go traveling first.

Here are some things the two share:

You're away from home fending for yourself...but you can't help but feel like you're just staying at some glorified camp.
You have to do little things for yourself like buy groceries, pay bills, and arrange your transportation.
You're in an environment with tons of other young people who don't know anyone and who want to make new friends quickly.
You have to share your room with one or more strangers (and their various annoying habits).
You have to use a communal bathroom.
You have to get a feel for the new town or city you're in.
You have to do your laundry in coin-operated machines.
If you're making your own food you have to cook in a communal kitchen.
You don't have a lot of money and have to be careful with your spending...but at the same time you can always count on your parents for help.
If you meet someone who wants to hookup with you, you don't have anywhere private to go.
You get to stay up late having profound conversations about life with your new friends.
You get to go out to corny bars in giant packs with all your new friends.

I'll say it again, the best reason to go traveling is because it's really fun. One week in another city getting in adventures with fellow travelers can be more fun than a month's worth of weekends in the real world. There are all kinds of other reasons to go that I haven't even touched on. The boost you could get in your social skills is just a happy side-effect.

Bonus section: A quick guide on how to arrange a backpacking trip

It's beyond the scope of this article to go in depth about how to organize a trip, but I'll try to cover the basics. Arranging a trip is one of those things that can seem overwhelming and complicated at first, but it's actually not that bad once you start tackling the individual little tasks you have to accomplish:

Figure out where you want to go

The most common places to go backpacking are Australia, Europe, and South-East Asia (i.e., Thailand and the surrounding countries). Each of these are interesting in their own ways and offer different experiences. They're all relatively tourist friendly, non-hardcore traveler destinations though. I'd use my gut to choose. Is there somewhere you've always wanted to visit?

Have some money to pay for it all

The expenses will vary depending on where you go, but you'll roughly need a couple of thousand dollars for your whole trip. There's up front expenses like buying your plane ticket, and then daily on-the-ground costs like food, hostels, getting around and entertainment. I'd almost say you need similar amounts whether the trip is a long or short one. For longer vacations you tend to stretch your money out more, and there are ways to cut costs or make more of it. On shorter trips you tend to blow through your cash in a more intense, focused way.

Arrange all the pre-trip details

Organizing a trip means going through a little To Do list. These all cost money.

Get a passport if you don't have one. If you have one already, get it renewed if it's going to expire during the time you're away.
Obtain travel visas to the countries you want to visit. A visa is a document/stamp in your passport that gives you permission to be in a country for a certain length of time (I remember getting a little confused about the term 'Visa' at first, because it sounds like the credit card company. ) You usually have to apply through the country's embassy or consulate to get one. You'll often have to show you have a return plane ticket and a certain amount of money in your bank account to be accepted. If you're visiting somewhere for a week or two, you get a tourist visa more or less automatically. But if you want to stay longer you have to arrange it ahead of time. For example, when I went to Australia I got a visa that let me stay up to a year, and work while I was there.
Get travel insurance. That way you'll be covered if hurt yourself and have to rely on another country's health care system.
Get any necessary vaccinations. If you're going to a tropical country, you may need these.
Book your plane ticket. Pretty simple, though you may have to hunt around for a good deal. You'll need a two-way ticket. There are all kinds of special tickets you can get, like the ability to make a certain number of Around the World stops for one fixed price. The options can be a little overwhelming.
If you plan on driving while you're away, get an International Driving Permit.

Arrange the details regarding what you're going to do when you're actually there

This is another set of To Do's. There's a mix of straightforward completing tasks, and some more general researching and planning.

If you haven't done so already, grab a travel guide (e.g., Lonely Planet) for your country of choice and read through it. What are the major cities and attractions? Where in the cities do backpackers stay? What types of things does it recommend you take into account? Expect some information overload here.
Do you want to rigorously plan your itinerary in advance, or wing it once you hit the ground? Where do you want to go, and what do you want to see?
Are you going to travel on your own, take an organized tour, or a mix of both? If you're doing a tour, then look into the various options and book one.
At the very least, reserve a room to stay for the first day you arrive. After that, do you want to find accommodation as you go, or book some or all of your hotel/hostel rooms ahead of time? If so, do that. Or if you're doing a tour, they may handle that for you.
Look into buying train/bus passes ahead of time. Like with plane tickets, there's a lots of options which can overwhelm your brain. And it will all depend on whether you want a strict schedule or flexibility. The same could be said of internal flights.
If you're going to work while you're there, are you going to try and pick up jobs as you go, or plan to be at a certain place at a certain time to get a certain job?

Get your supplies

Oh boy! Shopping!

Buy an actual backpack. To be honest, your backpack will often function as a glorified suitcase. But they're more practical to lug around than an actual heavy, bulky suitcase.
Get traveling knick knacks like a travel towel, travel mug, small flashlight, etc. Every traveler has their own little list of essentials they say you should bring. Again, to be frank, once you arrive you'll probably find you don't need half the stuff you brought, or you can pick it up there. Try not to overload your pack with too much junk.
Quick tip for fellow Canadians: If you sew a little Canadian flag on your backpack you'll get teased about it.

Once you've arrived it'll all come together

You can plan and research your trip all you want, but you'll probably still feel a little unsure of yourself and if you can do it. Once you actually land in that foreign country you'll figure everything out within a week or two. You'll learn to quickly get your bearings in a new city. You'll figure out how to communicate with people in countries that don't speak your language. And you'll have no problems getting to the next place you want to visit, and finding to stay once you get there. You may have freaked yourself out reading travel cautions, but once you're there you'll realize pickpockets and scam artists aren't thick on the ground. Odds are good you'll never even see any poisonous animals in Australia.

Overall, it's not that hard. It'll all seem a lot more manageable than it was when you were reading some abstract guide and trying to picture what your trip would be like from a bunch of hostel listings and street maps. If your travel plans aren't locked down ahead of time, expect half of them to change as new opportunities come up.